It’s been a long time since I’ve participated in Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop, but this week’s prompts couldn’t be ignored. I chose 3.) Write a poem about a time you felt betrayed.
Sexy and beautiful — magical words to insecure girls.
Beautiful enough for magazines.
Promises of fame.
$200 to the photographer who lies.
Photographer, no.
Creepy man on the subway with a camera, yes.
And yet.
The promise of fame.
Fat fingers between legs.
Fathers in next rooms.
It was just supposed to be pictures.
Say nothing. Get the fame.
This is not art.
Just let it happen, baby, smile.
This is how you get to the top, baby, smile.
This is the cost of fame, baby. Turn this way and smile.
You greedy fame wanter.
You didn’t say stop; it is your fault.
You let it happen; it is your fault.
Dumb ass never even got proofs.
Cry.
Regret.
Drink. More.
Twenty-one years does not erase it.
And fame never comes.
Raw. I hope you felt *some* peace after writing this.
*checking in from MamaKat’s*
I’m not sure. If nothing else, I think I got angrier. It awakened something that I’d pushed to the farthest corner so long ago and now it’s in the forefront of my mind, playing over and over — the what ifs, the if onlies. Ugh.
Love you… as always
And people like you are why I had no qualms hitting publish.
I saw this prompt and was so tempted to try.
What you’ve done here, is searingly real.
I saw the word betrayed and a door inside my mind opened. I closed that door so long ago, slammed it shut, locked it, walked away telling it to never try to get out. I was surprised that the door opened without a creak.
I’m so sorry you were betrayed that way. Such an honest heart-felt post.
This is so chilling and raw…
It makes me so so sad.
But you wrote this beautifully.
(((hugs))
You know, I was sad too at first. Then I got angry, and then it went back to sad. I thought of my girls and my heart broke because I hope I’m able to convey to them that they are enough, that they do not need an outsider to tell them that they are beautiful.
OH honey. Chills. I am constantly blown away by your brave, beautiful, evocative writing. Here’s a virtual hug.
Thank you, Gretchen; I appreciate you. And I needed this comment.
I can’t say anything better than the ladies before me haven’t already written. Your way with words are always so clear that I can almost feel myself in whatever situation you’re writing about. I’m always inspired to keep writing in hopes of becoming as good of a writer as you.
Hugs to you
Thank you for this. You have no idea how much it means for you to say these things. Y’all are really making me feel glad for getting out what bit I did. I know I need to do a full post on it but I also know that that won’t happen anytime soon.
You have such a gift of expression. I am in awe of you. Many hugs from me, too.
.
.
(And, for the record, I want to rip that guy’s privates off.)
Gutsy, and heartbreakingly honest. I want to sit down with you over coffee and have you teach me how to write with balls…like you do. I’m glad you shared this here, because it means that you won.
Arnebya, You are such an amazing writer. You can pull humor, pour your heart out and be the most honest, open person out there. So, I am going to change what I first wrote to – You are such an amazing person. Much love!
Wow! Your honesty gave me chills.
Father in next rooms…gah! Every parents worst nightmare. This poem says so much in so few words. Beautifully done.
What you touched on here, expressed, is heartbreaking and oh so real. You hit the nail on the head with feeling and honestly. I’m sorry for the situation. You did this beautifully!
I’m so sorry. And so impressed with your honesty. I am in awe of your words. ;(
I am late to this party but…whoa. You cut right through.
Big sigh.
This just makes me so sad. I wish I could give you a big hug. I’m so sickened by this happening to you. Knowing fathers were in the next room.
HUGS.
This touched me and made me want to cry. I have felt like this before but with my first bf in high school and had similar emotions…..basically I really connected with this. Made me want to cry. You are so brave for writing this (and of course your writing is amazing). I’ll just keep mine locked away. :(
That was a great poem, although I hate that you went through the hurt.